Looking back is something we all do but it seems we do it oftener when we get older. Perhaps because there is more to see behind us than before us?
When my children come to visit now and I see they are in pain, or that they don’t feel well, I think back to other times when they were young and healthy and full of life.
Remember when that child of yours was a baby? I do, and it seemed like there would never be an end to the diaper washing (yes, we washed diapers back in the day) the bathing, the burping, the spit-up, the floor walking and the singing of the same song at nap time or reading the same book at bedtime. And you thought you would never get to read anything of your own because your child was saying, “Read it just once more, please Mommy?” And you read it – – – just once more, never realizing that this would be the last time that request would be made. Because believe it or not, young mothers, there is a last time. And there is no way to know which time will be the last time.
One day you will sit and hold that sweet child while it sleeps and never know that this is the last time you will get to hold him while he sleeps.
One day you start to read your baby’s favorite book to him and he says, “No, Mommy, I’ll read it myself.” And he does. How could you have known the night before that that was the “last time.”
One day you start to tie the shoelace and he says, “No, Mommy, I’ll tie it myself.”
There is the last time for everything.
It doesn’t seem possible when you are hauling a kid around on your hip everywhere that there will come a day that you set them down to walk away and you’ll never pick them up again that way. Just like you will scrub them good in the bath one day and from that day on they will want to bathe by themselves and you will have bathed your child for the last time but you couldn’t have known the night before that it was the last time.
There will come that day that you hold their hand for the last time in the store and suddenly they are too big to hold Mom’s hand in public.
When thunder is rolling, is anything sweeter than a little voice in the dark saying, “Mommy, I’m scared can I get in bed with you?” And you get to cuddle that sweet child without knowing it is the last time he will feel the need for Mommy in the night.
One day they need you to go to school with them and the next they are so embarrassed if Mom is seen at school You never know when it will be the last time.
One day they will run to you with arms raised for the very last time. The sad part is, you won’t recognize it as the last time until there are no more times.
So while you are living in these times, enjoy the heck out of them and remember there are only so many of them and when they are gone, they are gone. And yearning for it won’t bring back that one last time so you can know and it enjoy it – – – one last time.